He Answers

Well I have to say that I never would have imagined that the most difficult part of this journey would be agreeing on a name for a child. Hey if you had it easy then consider yourself lucky! Before I got pregnant we had a list of names we both liked, not equally but it was a list. Then once we found out the gender its like those names went out the window and we couldn't come to an agreement. My thoughts revolved around our journey therefor I wanted my son to have a meaningful name. J on the other hand wanted names that weren't significant to what we've been through or did not sit well with me.

It was a never ending disagreement that it got to the point that I refused to bring up the subject to avoid him getting all torn up about it. J's thoughts were since it's going to be a boy he should have the right to name him. If we were having a girl he would allow me to name her with no questions asked. After going back and forth I decided maybe this was a subject I should bring up a month prior to my due date in hopes we both had time to really think about it. People would ask us consistently if we had agreed on a name yet which sometimes sparked up the "Which name do u like best?" conversation. SMH

Then one day while we were enjoying a peaceful afternoon talking about what we still need for this little ones nursery, J calmly turned to me, looked me straight in the eyes and spoke the words I never thought I would hear.

"Our son's name will be ... because I made a promise to God. A promise while we were uncertain if you were going to miscarry again. I left everything in his hands and now I need to keep my promise to him."

So it was set! Our son had a name, a name I felt good about. A name with a meaning. Little did I know that his name had a greater meaning than we originally thought. In my previous post I mentioned that my mother in law had been praying for our little one since she found out about our struggles. She never lost her faith that God would answer her prayer even before she had heard/ seen the news herself. I left out a few details on my previous post because I felt like it deserved its own post in hopes that it would help someones weary faith.

He listens even if you feel like your prayer isn't being answered.

When my mother in law was pregnant with J she had a difficult first trimester like I did. Constant bleeding that doctors couldn't explain. She said her stress levels were through the roof until one day she got on her knees to pray to the Virgin Mary & God. She surrendered her worries to them and said whatever the outcome was she would get through them with their help. As you all know J made it into this world but not without a fight. My mother in law was told she would need a c-section due to her placenta blocking her cervix. They thought it was too dangerous for her to try and deliver vaginally I'm fear of her hemorrhaging on the delivery table. Her c section was scheduled already but once again left everything in God's hands. A couple days before her scheduled c section she started going into labor. When she arrived at the hospital they did one last ultrasound. To her surprise, as well as the doctors, her placenta had shifted up and J was ready to come out.

What an astonishing miracle but her worries weren't over yet. J was born not breathing he actually suffered with severe asthma growing up. It was more than one occasion that he stopped breathing. Not only as a baby but as a toddler too. I'm happy to report his asthma is completely gone now. I believe he's only used his inhaler for less than a month since we've been dating. Woohoo! J is also a miracle baby how cool is that? When J was around 2 or 3 my mother in law was pregnant again. She didn't go much into detail about this pregnancy since I would imagine the pain it brings her to remember. My mother in law delivered her second son stillborn at 6 months. They never found a reason as to why this happened which made things even more difficult for her. I've always known of these two events in her life, so why am I bringing this up now? When we told my mother in law the name of our son she smiled. I figured she liked it and understood the reason as to why we chose that name. Until my sister in law looked at her mom and smiled as well. She then told J, "That was the name that was given to our brother." J was a bit shocked to hear but what surprised me the most was that our son is actually named after his great grandfather. How could J not know his own grandfather's name??

My MIL went on to tell us that she named both her sons after their grandfather. She gave J his first name and his brother the middle name. Hearing these words truly warmed my heart. It made me realize my son has many angels looking over him. His uncle, his great grandfather, and his siblings. From that moment on I knew in my heart his name was meant to be.

We sometimes feel like we pray endlessly with no answers. It can get tiring, frustrating, etc but if u take a moment to listen to what is around u he might just be answering. I know my son is not in my arms yet and anything can happen in the last four weeks BUT I believe this was his way of telling us our son is here to stay.

Don't worry I am revealing the name of our son....

Ismael means God Listens

I love his first name for many reasons. The meaning behind it is my favorite. It's also a unique name I don't see it often. Although someone did give me a coke that said share a coke with Ismael. Don't worry I didn't drink it.

Jesus we all know who he is. As mentioned above it was also J's brothers name.

Always seek him even if you feel like he is not listening. When he finally answers it will bring great emotions.